Wednesday, November 6, 2013

Unschooling & Unjudgement

When people first come to Unschooling they have often different expectations of what it really looks like.
They expect children to pick up text books that interest them and begin educating themselves in a way that resembles how kids are forced to learn in schools. These parents are often confused as to what natural learning is all about. They begin to force, reward, coerce and fear grows. Through Unschooling, kids learn through what they are interested in. Their interests are the nucleus of their learning. They learn from everything they explore, create and experience. When a parent limits media out of fear, children have their learning tools stripped of them. Their world becomes smaller. As Unschooling parents, we want to give our children an enormous world to learn and grow from. We want to offer them a buffet of every food imaginable! It is through true choice that children find who they really are and what their passions are.

Devin created these tools with his own two hands, after being inspired by the show, "Mountain Men".

Devin found an old hoe on our property and made a handle for it. He has been very inspired to begin homesteading more seriously, so we are facilitating that together.

Here, Devin is playing Grand Theft Auto 5. I do not value him playing this any less than I do him creating with his hands as in the two photos above. I know that he learns from this game. He connects with his friends and they do missions together. It is an incredible game, actually! Our whole family enjoys it together.

I trust Devin and his choices. I know that we can connect with him through all of his interests and choices in life. I know that children see all of their interests as an extension of themselves. When a parent judges, or doesn't value a certain interest, the child internalized it and views this part of him as not having value or being "junk" or "bad". It creates such negativity within the child and the parent/child relationship. Judgement causes the very thing that the parent is fearful that the game will cause. Talk about a self-fulfilled prophesy!

Any interest in an opportunity for connection, learning and growth.

The objective of Unschooling is not education. It is connection, happiness, and building that strong foundation where all else grows through a strong, loving family. An education does happen as a byproduct of this focus, but it not held above the importance of laying that foundation of family. Ever. People who have children in school do not have this option. Schools force their needs to come before family, which unfortunately affects the family in profound ways. 

I am so grateful for our lives and I hope to inspire families to take the freedom that is there waiting for them. I want parents to let go of fear and value their children's interests as the amazing learning opportunities that that they truly are.

~Peace & Love, Dayna


Excuse Me? said...

Thank you Dayna!! I needed this.. today in fact. When given choices my 5 year old will choose building worlds on disney infinity or his ipad over playing outside and even going to the y. I have been so concerned that I have cut him off a few times. This is very confusing to my brainwashed mind. I feel the judgement of " you just let him play video games all day!" He's only five I say.
Thank you

MJ Baldwin said...

Devin has talent! He should start a blog of some sort where he can share his work in one place so that we can all marvel at it. Its also neat to see the progression of his work, because as you have mentioned, a person's hobbies are an extension of themselves. It is neat to see how kids change, especially through their creations.-- signed a 14 year old