Saturday, October 3, 2009
For years now I have written about Tiff's intense nature. She is turning 8 years old next Monday! I have to share that her sensitivity and intensity has faded so much as she has grown. She is so much like me and we are both very sensitive people.
I remember when she was only 2 years old, she used to scream for everything. She wouldn't let me brush her teeth and finding clothes that didn't annoy her was challenging. Everything seemed to be such a struggle. I never thought that I could have any other children with the intensity of her needs. It was more than I ever thought parenting could ever be...
I honestly could cry thinking about how hard it was to parent a child like Tiff was for years. Now, I am proud to say that Tiff can not be considered "Sensitive" or "Intense" anymore. I thought that I would be always parenting a child with unique needs, but not anymore.. The qualities that made her intense in the past have made her so helpful and focused on getting whatever it is she wants in life.
After 8 years with a child who screamed and cried and yelled to voice her needs, I realize that it was only such a short season in her life. We never punished her for the way she voiced her needs. We talked, explained, discussed, shared and connected. Tiff has grown to be the most incredible human being. When we honor our kids, wherever they are, and parent them respectfully and lovingly they learn that they can always count on us to love them unconditionally! Tiff, my darling, sensitive daughter is my best friend, and such a little advocate for respectful, peaceful parenting. She is truly the most kind, loving person that I know to others.
We were told by others that if we didn't punish her she would never grow out of it, or learn that the way she was communicating wasn't "appropriate". Well those *others* were wrong... You never need to punish a child for them to learn these things in life.
Tiff has an incredible altruistic quality and understanding of others needs.. I know in my heart that this is because we have always respected and met her needs as a person, as hard as it was to stay centered in the midst of her intensity. Tiff... my intense daughter has now outgrown the label of "intense" and "sensitive" and has come out on the other side.
Tiff is a Whole, Perfect, Beautiful Girl inside and out.
I love you little girl! I have always trusted *Who You Were*. It was all worth it.. You are the most amazing human being that I have ever met. I can't imagine who you would be today if I would have listened to others who told me to put you in school, and medicate you into compliance and obedience for the last few years. I am so glad that I listened to my inner knowing that All Would Be Well.
This is the last post that I will write about Tiff's former Intense nature. We are moving forward and leaving it behind. Her sensitivity is a gift and something I am so grateful for.
Posted by Dayna Martin at 6:53 PM